The Rest of Me

September 25, 2009

I arrived yesterday, I guess I can die…

Coz before me, unexpectedly, was Khai

Not a chance to glance at her eyes

I saw her back though, felt as cold as ice…

 

I walked wearin’ a smile toward a place

With every step moved with haste

Strugglin’ like good ol’ Jack…

With me wanting to call and say, “hey, I’m back”

 

I was overwhelmed by a familiar emotion

Slow phased but caused me exacerbation

I felt something pinched my heart

Long time ago, but it hit like dart

 

I recall her say eventually I’d find someone new

but why do I feel like there is no one else but you

I gathered my thoughts and walked, without a clue

even needed to close my eyes just to get it through

 

How could I ever forget that one-eyed cat

She saw one and everything was cut

Took it as a big joke but she made it reality

I don’t even know if there’s any certainty…

 

Until now, baffled to why it ended with just one click

It sucks coz’ my thoughts failed me to comprehend answers real quick

I know I will hold her mem’ry as I held her once

I can and will hold it, even if it cuts like a lance….

 

I remember that night in Sta. Ana

That now the only word left is “sana”

Water as sea made me closer to her

Water as tear was meant to stay after

 

You can never blame me for making this so lonely

What can I do? I shed my tears and she’s the only

Knowing her was just one thing I guess

Loving her…*chuckle*…come, be it put to test….

 

Here I am again with thoughts bended

Coz’ perhaps a part of me never made it nor mended

Of all those things I kept inside encrypted

This will only be my way to make it sacred

 

I can never escape the thought of all that might have been

Knowing now, they are nothing but a dream…

For Three, I’m wishing every single day

Only Happiness in every way

Lass

September 15, 2009

I’ve lived officially for 22 years now…

With me taking every gapping gnaw…

Seen myself die like a clown…

Growing tired, they question me, how…

 

Sometimes it is better to look happy

Instead of you explaining why so jumpy

Yes, people see me smile like Humpty

With Dark side lurking unknowingly 

 

I can never ask for more I say

Really? I think twice with dismay

I’ve tried to control what comes my way

Ending up losing, and then I pay…

 

I started living when I met LM

With deep breath I spit it like phlegm…

Yes, I was being repelled by them…

But now it’s my turn, I’ll devour ‘em…

 

I’ve given the real man in me

Proved it was just a wasted gesture to be

Now watch, you will curse me…

I’ll be breakin’ you unsuspectingly…

 

I know it is forbidden

But this is a path I have chosen

They unleashed me and until then…

 My turn!! I say again

 

They killed what LM made in me

Vengeance creepin’ would agree

The new Jap is waiting and is free

Now’s the time, I will move “Killing Spree!”

Abomination

September 14, 2009

No one knows but it shows

No one would understand the things I pose

As simple as my mentality it rose

Beyond my reckoning it goes

 

I speak of my purpose in time

Yes, Incapacitating like crime

Resilient in a straight line

But few would consider it sublime

 

I saw myself bow before pain

Reasoning behind dark corrupted shame

Enshrouded by clouds of maim

Now, those acts will come in vain

 

Vanity for years I resisted

Now, Hatred I crave and commended

I know I’m devastatingly demented

But please do accept my amendment

 

Altering my efficacy is one thing

Coz’ ominous ideas still hanging

I’ve grown numb to what they call longing

For I will never again seek what is dying

 

My plans will nurture by faith

No perspective will cure this hate

You will call me cold like wraith

For in their tears, I will bathe…